I looked into Tony’s sad eyes a week and a half ago and told him, “This too shall pass…” These are the words my mother has told me time and time again – through heartbreaks, surgeries, job rejections…all the bumps in life. And she’s always been right. Those moments did pass. It was an early Wednesday morning and Tony had been waiting for ‘the call.’ The call that would get him a job. The call that would pull him out of his depressing funk.
After we arrived back in the states, almost two months ago, we spent a week in Ohio with my family for Christmas and then found ourselves in Atlanta. Jobless. Homeless. Carless. Nothing. We were literally starting over. I believe that most people, at some point in their lives, have wanted to start over. Get rid of everything they own, go to a new place, and just be whoever they decide to be. Well, I’ve done just that. I recreated a life with almost nothing but a few dollars left in my savings account. I sit here typing this and wanting so badly to describe what it feels like, to put my emotions into words. But I don’t know that I can. I’ve cried, laughed, felt relief, felt thankful, screamed, and cried and laughed more. But oddly, through it all, I never lost faith that it would turn out. I knew there would be a day, soon, where Tony and I would be rushing off to work in the morning, not enjoying coffee with each other as the morning slipped away. I told myself through it all to ‘just feel it, appreciate the moment, as it will pass quickly.’ And it did.
We spent a month living in hotels, spending our days applying to jobs, interviewing, having to make decisions about our futures. We couldn’t get an apartment – no sane landlord would lease to a couple that has no income. We had to explain, time and time again, to potential employers how we landed in Atlanta, always getting a very skeptical look back. The uncertainty of where we would live, work, and begin our lives was exhausting. But again, I knew deep down, that as soon as it came together, it would happen quickly and these moments of living like a nomad would end.
A month ago, just that happened. I received an offer from a company that I wasn’t interested in, but the offer letter allowed us to sign a lease. At last, after 70 days, we would be reunited with our bed. I wouldn’t have to wear the same gray sweater over and over again. I could boil water on the stove. We finally had a home!
It was fun moving in, looking at each room and deciding where we would put the furniture. We wanted a chalkboard wall, a tradition Tony and I had started in California, and so I taught Tony how to paint. (Yes, I am more handy than Tony, but he’s a good learner.) I also taught him how to use a drill, which he still insists is not that fun, but I know that he had to have enjoyed it. Who doesn’t like playing with power tools?! Our home was coming together. Our new lives were just beginning.
A few days later, I got an offer from my former employer and accepted it. Things were quickly coming together. The last piece of the puzzle was Tony’s job. He had a very promising interview and it was taking every bit of patience in the man as he waited day in and day out for the call from the hiring manager. I tried desperately to keep him busy, to distract him, but the anxiety was wearing on him and became almost unbearable. That Wednesday morning, around 10 am, I knew it couldn’t go on much longer. He was slipping into a minor depression.
The next day though, as soon as he got out of the shower, the call came. The relief we both felt, that our families felt, was incredible. We celebrated all day, and just like that, our next chapter was beginning. I started my new job a week ago and Tony will start his in a week. Our new lives are coming together.
I know that the journey never ends, there really is no destination. The past 90 days were life changing. I don’t regret them and I’m not afraid of the future. I’m grateful that I was capable of learning so much about myself and about the world. That things fell together, differently than I would have ever imagined. So as I write this, with everything going so well in my life, I remind myself that this too shall pass. It’s the way life goes, the bad comes and goes, and the good comes and goes. The rollercoaster we’re each on everyday is what makes our life stories.